How long does instant cash out take?

Okay, so you want me to make that text sound more like a real person complaining (in a friendly way, of course!) about the agonies of waiting for instant cash out? I can totally do that. Here’s my take:

“Ugh, seriously, how long does instant cash out actually take? I mean, they call it ‘instant,’ right? You’d think it would be, well, instant! Officially, they say it can be lightning fast – like, BAM! Money in your account. And sometimes, bless their little electronic hearts, it actually is. But then… then there are the other times. You know, the times when it feels like it’s mocking you, dragging its feet all the way to… three business days?! Three! What is this, the Stone Age?

It’s all down to the bank, apparently. My bank, specifically, and their mysterious, unknowable processes. Like, why can’t they just do it? I remember this one time I was sure I had enough in my account to cover a last-minute concert ticket… hit ‘instant cash out,’ and then… crickets. Had to miss the show. Seriously, the DRAMA! So yeah, instant cash out… sometimes instant, sometimes a cruel joke. I just wish it was more… predictable, you know?”