What is saying the wrong word called?

What’s it called when you say the wrong word? Oh, man, that’s a funny one! I was just thinking about this the other day, actually. My aunt, bless her heart, she’s a walking, talking malapropism machine! It’s called a malapropism, apparently – a word that sounds almost right, but is completely wrong. Like, totally, hilariously wrong.

Remember that time she said she was going to “nip it in the butt”? Instead of “nip it in the bud,” of course. I nearly choked on my tea! Or how about when she described someone as having “a plethora of pimples”? I mean, seriously? A plethora? It’s such a fancy word for something so… well, pimple-y. It’s the kind of thing that makes you want to hide your face, but secretly, you’re thinking, “Oh my god, that’s amazing!” You know? It’s like a verbal train wreck, but you can’t help but be charmed by the chaos.

I read somewhere – I think it was a blog, maybe? – that malapropisms are actually a sign of a really active brain, trying to access words super fast. So maybe my aunt’s just, like, super brilliant and her brain’s working overtime? I’d prefer to think so anyway! It’s much better than the alternative, which is that she’s just wonderfully, hilariously clumsy with words. And honestly? I think I prefer the second option. It’s way more entertaining.